Mice-a-Roni

For those of you who don't know (which probably isn't many) ...I'VE BEEN ATTACKED BY MICE. You heard me, a platoon of mice have set up camp in my apartment.

Now, I'm not normally the type of girl who shrieks and jumps on furniture when she sees mice. I caught one before Mexico, and thought that was the end of it. Left 4 traps up, and didn't catch (or see) another one for a good three weeks.

Well. That all changed Saturday morning. I was laying in bed, having my idea of a perfect Saturday--reading US Weekly and watching E! News Weekend. (Before you judge, I read Newsweek and watch the news. Sometimes. Not often. Oh, fine, only when I'm at the dentist.) Anyway, as I'm lazing about, I realized, "Hmm. I feel something in my hair. That's weird." So, I reached up to see what exactly was going on. Bad idea. As I reached up to pat my head...I LAUNCHED A MOUSE OUT OF MY HAIR AND ACROSS MY BED. Yup, you heard me. I'll give you a moment to recover. So, after I screamed at the top of my lungs, I grabbed my magazine and pillow, and set up shop on the couch in my family room. After my heart rate returned from outer space, I began reading People and watching The Soup. Ahhh. Balance was once again restored to my word. For about 5 seconds.

Looking up, I saw a mouse scurry around my recycling. I sat up and stomped into the kitchen, and glared at the little SOB. He retreated. I returned to the couch, picked up my magazine, and saw one of his brothers dart under the refrigerator. BAST***. (I don't know if you can cuss on blogs. Use your imagination.) By now, my heart is about to explode, I'm shaking, and I've called Tim twice to update him on the mice situation. His theory--they had returned from a night of partying at Moe and Jonny's and were too drunk to realize they'd come out of hiding. Thank you Tim, very helpful. Well, not 30 seconds later, once taunts me by dancing around my trash can. (Authors note: My apartment is very clean. I'm a compulsive dust buster. So don't think I'm dirty.)

At this point, I've begun to feel like I'm in a bad horror movie, so I surrender. Packing up a bag, I head to Krissi's where I hid out for the rest of the day. Plotting my attack all the while. I returned Sunday morning, and set out 10 STICKY TRAPS! HA! THIS IS WAR. I'm pleased to announce mom and I caught one. (You can imagine the shrieks that ensued as we threw him out.)

I have no qualms about killing these little rodents. I will bomb them, shoot them, spear them or grind them into mince meat pie. I just want them gone. If anyone has any mouse hunting tips, please share. Until then, it's on. Like donkey kong.