Random Musings...

Well, once again, I'm starting off my blog for apologizing for how long it's been since I last posted. I'm coming off of working our annual State Conference, so I'm a little loopy right now. There is no "theme" to this blog - just some random thoughts that have been runnin' through my head. For those of you who know me (and that's probably everyone, b/c otherwise why would you be reading this blog) you'll know that I have some random thoughts. Here goes...

What do they put in Orange Crush to make it so damned good? Honestly, is there any soft drink better than orange drinks? I think not.

How is it that I find myself invited to 4 Super Bowl parties when I haven't watched one game this year? Nothing against the Colts - I just hate football.

I just found out that all of the Fazoli's in Indianapolis used to be Rax - who knew??

How on earth are these girls on 16 and Pregnant worried about being pregnant again??? It's called birth control ladies, and you can get it for less than the cost of a movie at your local Planned Parenthood. Or, better yet, it's called abstinence...

Is Lady Gaga really a man/transvestite/hermaphrodite?

Am I the only person left who still watches Celebrity Apprentice and LOVES it? I mean, really, really loves it.

Some words I've noticed that people over 75 use: "programs = tv shows", "slacks = work pants", "dinner = supper", and so on.

All right, that's all I've got. Over and out.

What I'm Thankful For

With Thanksgiving fast approaching, I would like to take a moment to list some of the things for which I'm thankful - from the serious to the silly. In no particular order, I'm thankful for:

1. My family - I truly don't know where I'd be without them. My parents are my heroes; my grandparents are truly an inspiration. My brother and sister are my best friends. My sister in law is a bonus sibling who I love dearly, and don't even get my started on Maggie and Henry.

2. Having a job. I hear so many stories about smart, hard-working people who can't find a job. I'll never take mine for granted. The next time I groan when the alarm clock goes off at 6.30 am (I don't get up til 7:00, but whatever) I'll try to remember to be thankful that I have to get up.

3. Having such a great group of friends - from girls night games of Taboo, to Book Club, to spaghetti and Desperate Housewives with Em and Zach, to weekly 30 minute phone calls with Nicole, I'm so blessed to have such awesome friends.

4. And now on to the not so serious things - first and foremost, my DVR. A mere two years ago, I didn't have a DVR. I've tried to block out that time in my life. DVR may be the best invention ever...certainly in the top five, along with water, the wheel, penicillin, and bubble bath.

5. Hot french fries from McDonalds. Seriously, people, is there anything better than piping hot, crispy fries from McD's? I think not. For some reason, they taste best from the Cicero McDonalds - the road trip makes you feel like you've somehow earned them.

6. My pillow. I don't know how to explain it, other than it's perfect. It always seems to be cool against my face, and it's fluffy and never gives me a neck ache. My pillow has been to Argentina, Canada, and Terre Haute (more times than it probably wishes). It even has a name - Dotty.

7. Project Runway. I love it. Everything about it - when Tim Gunn says "Use the Macy's accessory wall thoughtfully" I convulse into laughter like it's the first time I've heard him say that. Watching the designers craft amazing clothes out of trash from a New Jersey waste department wows me every time. I could watch it for hours on end. And do sometimes, come to think of it.

8. Books - duh. Is there really anything better than finishing a great book and then deciding which book to read next? Stacking them all up, reading the jacket covers, studying the author's picture...

9. Cokes with crushed ice. Are you with me Lambert and Foster women? Nothing taste better than an ice cold coke with finely crushed ice. "Nectar of the Gods" as my mom says.

10. Lochaven Lodge - this has been my family's get away for the last 25 years, and I truly look forward to the first week of August for 51 weeks of the year. No phones, no computers, no tv - just the French River, piles of books, and countless games of euchre to dominate. Paradise.

What about you? What are you thankful for? Me, I'm pretty thankful that Parks and Recreation and the Office are on in a few minutes!! :-)

I stink at Scary Movies

So, last weekend, I attempted - twice - to see a scary movie. I thought, it's Halloween, time to get in the spirit!

I used to love scary movies - not gory ones, but campy "I Know What you Did Last Summer" and "Urban Legends." I loved that feeling I would get where I felt like I might (simultaneously) cry/scream/giggle/pee my pants. That feeling that someone was, quite possibly, about to sneak up behind you at any minute.

Well, I'm sorry to say, I struck out this year. Last Friday, Krissi, Nate, and Liz and I were going to go to Hanna's Haunted House. It's supposed to be AWESOME. I got all bundled up, hiked on my Tuggs (Target - Uggs) and was ready to rock it. Mother Nature had different plans - there was a monsoon in Greenwood. You can't even imagine how hard it rained. It was not even nice weather for a duck. So, after a yummy hamburger at BJs (I know, the name is bad) we canoed over to the theater to see Paranormal Activity. Now - I had been reluctant to see this movie because I feared that it was going to be all shaky, artsy camera work that would make me dizzy. I have actually thrown up watching home movies, so I literally can't watch movies that use the hand-held, shaky camera work. Turns out - I was right! The camera work was awful. I sat with my scarf wrapped over my eyes, composing a grocery list in my head. To make matters worse, the theater was so crowded I was about 4 rows back from the front. Vomit. I think we lasted for 30 minutes. I was never so happy to see a movie theater lobby.

A few days later, Mom and I met up for a movie. We decided to either see "The Stepfather" or "Couples Retreat." Now, my mom didn't know that I had already seen "Couples Retreat" - she gets very indignant when I see movies more than once. Not sure why. So - since I failed at "Paranormal Activity" we decided to see "The Stepfather". Mom and I have quite a history at seeing scary movies - about 50% of the time we have to leave because I get so scared. This started when I was about 4 and had to flee the Diana where we were catching "Ghostbusters" right up until the present. Well, we made it - literally - through about 15 seconds of the opening scene. They were still flashing the names of the actors on the screen when we looked at each other, grabbed all of our coats, snacks, and cokes and hightailed it to the other side of the theater where we saw "Couples Retreat." As the lights came up, I looked at Mom and said, "I have a confession...I've already seen that movie...". Don't worry, we're still friends.

I think I've learned my lesson - no more scaries for me. Give me a comedy, a chick flick, or a juicy historical drama and I'm all in. Otherwise, I'm going to have to pass. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to watch "Love Actually" for the 724th time.

Pop Culture - even I'm getting a little sick of it...

I know, I know - I never thought I'd say that. I'm the person who subscribes to People and US, and then always picks the longest line in the grocery store so that I can read In Touch and OK! I consider AJ Hammer a very reliable newssource.

That said - I'm SO OVER the Gosselins that I may go crazy if I read one more article about them; I don't want to hear any more about Letterman's dalliances, and when I read about "Balloon Boy" and his family, I feel really sad for those 3 kids.

I think that's the difference - celebrity watching used to be fun; a mindless entertainment break from the 9 to 5 routine that most of America follows. Don't get me wrong; I would never trade my life for that of say, Paris Hilton, for 10 minutes. But I sure got a kick out of hearing about parties at Chateu Marmont, and laughing at the complete stupidity of someone buying an $800 purse.

But now, well, a lot of the stories making headlines just aren't funny. Take the Gosselins - there are 8 little people who are going to be irrevocably screwed up because their parents can't seem to put their egos aside and buck up and actually, I don't know, put their kids' best interests first. Sadly, parents divorce every day, all over the world. And it's heartbreaking and hard on the kids and the parents; and that's WITHOUT every move, snide remark,and temper flare being reported to every major media outlet in the country. It's just not fun to watch a family rip apart.

I have been a Letterman fan since I was allowed to stay up late on Friday nights and snuggle up on the couch with my mom to watch him. I didn't miss an episode in college, and DVR him now. Yet, I saw absolutely no humor in his infamous confession that he had sex with past staffers. Who he wants to sleep with is certainly none of my business. Will I still watch him? Probably. But no part of me got a kick out of watching him make a joke out of the situation - have some respect for your wife and your son. That little boy will inevitably end up seeing that clip on You Tube in a few years, and I really doubt he'll find it as amusing as the audience seemed to.

Okay, I'm going to come down from my soapbox. I'm certainly not righteous enough that I'm swearing off reality tv or gossip magazines. I just think there should be a line - when parents are building homemade UFOs and then telling the world their 6 year old is hiding in it so they can extend their 15 mintues of Wife Swap fame, then that is going too far. Whatever happened to good ol' conniving on Survivor, amongst adults who all knew exactly what they were getting into? Leave the kids out of the equation.

Why Reading is, quite simply, Awesome

So, as many of you may know, I'm a bit of an obsessive reader. There is, quite literally, very few things in the world I would rather than do than curl up with a good book and escape into the world of my characters, sometimes for hours at a time.

I'm not sure what it is about books that speak to me so much - I will read just about anything, from historical fiction, to cheesy romance, to sassy chick-lit, to mystery (although not at night - I'm a scaredy cat!) to tell-all biographies. Whenver I read a book, I always find myself casting the main characters in a movie. Inevitably, Hollywood adapts the book a few years later, and I get so excited to see the book that I've been known to start countdowns (ie My Sisters Keeper). And, inevitably, the movie just never compares. Am I the only one who, when not reading a book, finds myself thinking about the characters, wondering what they're doing? It's like part of me is afraid they're up to something and I don't know about it. Crazy, I know.

I have an ongoing debate with a co-worker that libraries, bookstores, and actual physical books are soon going to be a thing of the past. Kind of like redheads and answering machines. To this I say...Noooooooooooooo. I refuse to believe that "e-books" are going to erase old-fashioned, physical books. Nothing can replace cracking open a good book, holding those pages in your hands, that "new smell" book, dog-earing the page to mark your spot so you can run to make a mug of hot chocolate...

What do you think? Are books destined for extinction? One of my good friends and fellow book clubber has a Kindle and she loves it. I remain a skeptic. As for libraries, according to the Indianapolis Star, they've seen membership grow by nearly a million people due to the economy being in the toilet. I jumped on the library bandwagon a year and a half ago, and praise it loudly and proudly to anyone who will listen. I always have about 3 books checked out, and 6 more on hold, and I'm always renewing or loaning them out to friends (converts if I have my way...).

And don't even get me started on Barnes and Noble - the only downside to my library membership: no reason to go kill 2 hours at Barnes and Noble. Sometimes I still go in, and take pictures of new releases with my cell phone and then go get them at the library. Sad, I know, but a girl has got to have her Barney's fix once in a while.

So let's hear it: favorite books? worst book-to-movie adaption (and vice versa?) Any favorite reading spots? (My porch swing is tied with my bath tub.) Anyone serectly think they can write a best-seller? (Because I so KNOW I can... :-) )

Now, if you'll excuse me, The Ex Mrs. Hedgefund is calling my name...

Automatic Doors and all that jazz

Hello Faithful readers (and by that I mean my family, Emily, and Nicole...)

Well, it's now been about 5 months since I've blogged. Oops! I SWEAR I'm going to be better. So, I was walking into Target the other day, when I realized something. We have become so used to technology and automated things that it's become comical. What do I mean....read on for some examples.

1. As I walked into Target, I found myself waiting to enter through the automated doors. I was about the 5th person in line when I realized, Geez, Lindsay, just push open the damned door beside you and walk right in. I mean, 10 years ago we all got by just fine opening and closing our own doors, rather than waiting for a machine to do it for us.

2. My bathroom at work has automatic flushers, which has led me to have a wet butt more times then I care to remember. Any slight move and the thing flushes and sprays toilet water. Sort of like a surprise bidet. The bathroom also has automatic soap, of all things. So, standing, impatiently, with my hands under the faucet, waiting for the automatic sink to kick only. Ha! Jokes on me. Just to keep us on our toes, we actually have to turn on and off the water.

3. My car is old. Not 1980 old, but a 2002 Malibu Maxx. It doesn't have automatic door unlockers. I actually have to physically insert my key into the the key slot on my door, turn it, and unlock the door. You wouldn't believe how indignant my passengers get that they have to ...gasp...wait for me to unlock the door and get in befoe I can open their door. I want to shout, for god's sake people, not so long ago every one had to actually open their doors. And hotels?? They used to open and shut with this strange metal device called a key...

4. Don't get me started on voicemail. It is 2009. Pretty much anyone over the age of 8 has a cell phone. Even my dad has a cell phone, and he loves to do some texting. So WHY do the cell phone voicemail ladies insist on giving a voicemail lesson every. single. time. you leave a message??? We get it - wait for the beep, leave a message, done. Instead, "if you want to leave a callback number, press 412." Or, and this is my favorite, whenever I call Nicole, her lady says, "If you want to send a fax..." Um, hello? If I wanted to leave a fax I would...send a fax!! Not call her damned voicemail.

Those are just a few examples of how spoiled I've gotten by technology. In fact, as I write this, I found myself getting impatient that my email wasn't loading as fast as I wanted it to. Deep breath. Not everything needs to be instant gratification. In fact, some things I like the old fashioned way. I hate online shopping. I like actually going inside the bank and talking to the teller. I love getting a card in the mail, and taking the time to send one. I even kind of miss having to drop your pictures off to be developed. It was so exciting to pick the pictures up and see how they'd turned out!

What about you? What crazy things have you become reliant on, and what do you miss? Me, I miss VHS, but man, I can't imagine living without my DVR!!!

Spring has Sprung! (sort of...)

Hi All! So, I'm a bad blogger - I tend to blog about once a month. I'm going to try and get better about that! Spring has, at least for a few short, glorious today, sprung here in the Hoosier state! The past 4 days have been spent without huge winter coats, the absence of salt/melting snow/sludge on the ground, and windows opened letting in fresh air! Just these few days have totally got me in the mood for Spring/Summer in Indiana! I decided I would do one of my favorite things, which is make a list. I present Po's top 10 favorite things to do in Indiana when the weather turns nice!

10. Go for walks - either on the Monon, or around the many cute neighborhoods in Broad Ripple. I love passing moms with kids in strollers, hard core cyclists, and the "punk bridge kids" walking around the canal. There's just something about not being cooped up in a gym...

9. Getting a pedicure at BR Nails. I love to go here when I'm not in any kind of hurry. They always have the newest magazines (Life & Style, In Touch, OK!...you name it, they have it!) and the pedicure chairs are heavenly. I love picking out my color, and then sinking into the pedicure chair and totally shutting off for the next 30 minutes...

8. Eating outside at Plumps. Great music, great tenderloins, an adult beverage or two, and good friends. Of course, Plumps can be substituted for Moe & Johnny's, Hogs Head, etc. Just love dining "al fresco".

7. Going to Indianapolis Indians games. This is one of my very favorite things - sitting on a blanket on the lawn, eating a hot dog and drinking a big ol' lemonade, watching the "Kiss Cam" and singing "Take Me out the Ballgame." The actual game is secondary to the fun of participating in "America's Pastime!"

6. Walking up the Monon to the SnoCone Shack! This little shack in the heart of BR is one of my hot spots during the Spring/Summer - especially on Monday's, which is double stamp night. I always get the classic - grape, cherry, and orange. Can't go wrong. There's always a line - teenagers, parents with kids, retirees. I even love standing in line at the Sno Cone Shack.

5. Going to the Biergarten at the Rathskellar to listen to the Polka Boys! Got to get there early, I've learned this the hard way. I truly think there isn't a more fun place in the city than the Biergarten and the Polka Boys on a nice night. Nothing like a cold drink, a big pretzel, and hundreds of happy people singing and dancing the polka to ring in the weekend.

4. Cooking out. Doesn't matter where. Where there's a cookout, there's cornhole, hot dogs, and brownies. Sitting with friends in the backyard, trash talking each other’s corn hole skills, and eating grilled out food is about as good as it gets.

3. Sitting on my porch/patio (which I'm currently without but will soon have) and reading a good book and eating a green flavor ice! I love to get home from work, change into comfortable clothes, and sit on the porch until it gets too cold/windy/dark and I have to go in.

2. Laying out by the pool at 206 N. Conde! Ahhh... Usually accompanied by a South Pole coke, a book, and my family, along with 100.5 (Kokomo's country station) on the radio. I never worry about how I look or who I might see. Just total relaxation.

1. Going to see a movie on the lawn of the Indianapolis Museum of Art. I think this is Indy's best secret - although, it's not so secret anymore! Bring in a picnic, cards, lawn chairs, and you've got yourself a night. I love laying down when it's dark and watching some 80's movie on the huge screen, pulling on a sweatshirt once it gets chilly about 10:00.

Well, those are my favorite warm weather activities. What are yours?? Bring on the spring!